Log in

Welcome to the Life.. [entries|friends|calendar]

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[22 Jun 2005|12:11am]
[ mood | okay ]

ok so i have not updated in a while so here goes. prom was fun...thats about all that was, being with my friends, the car ride, dinner. thats it. my date was horrible...it is THE worst feeling in the world to be left standing with a group of couples dancing all by yourself while your date just disappears. thank god i ran into an old friend that i haven't talked to since the beginning of the year & we were going through kinda the same thing so we hung out & i began to redevelop that long time crush that has always been there between me & him. i really thought that something was goona transpire from that night but like always....NOTHING. we are apparently better off as friends cause it would just be too wierd. thats how it always is..too wierd. but anyways prom was kind of a flop...i looked good though...thats always a plus. but so yea i am now a SENIOR & that is way exciting & i am so ready to be done with high school and get out of smithsburg. but in a way i don't wanna leave...i have always dreamed of finding the love of my life in high school..my tractor boy who loves me for who i am and loves being with me...but unfortunately that isn't gonna happen. but i'm hopin to go to shepherd & thats in WV so there will be tractor boys there too!..lol. and there has gotta be something more out there & i'm so ready to find it. i can't wait to start of my career and teach amazing kids and prepare them for their lives. & as much as i am ready to start my career i am looking forward to all the other parts also. dating, falling madly in love with someone, partying, hanging out with people i love and so much more. but all that will come in time & i'm sure it will come just as fast as the past 3 years of high school have flew by. but anyways...we leave for the beach on sunday & i can't wait! i love getting away even if it is only for a week..new surroundings are always good for me..different people, sun, sand, the waves of the atlantic..o i can not wait! anyways i think i'm gonna go

love always

1 comment|post comment

I want to fall in love.... [14 May 2005|11:25pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

So here I sit 11:25 on a saturday night with absolutely nothing to do but update my journal. Is that pathetic? so today i worked from 11-4 then mom & dad took me out for dinner. i realized how much of a daddy's girl i am tonight. Dad was hunting for like 3 days & to be honest with you i didn't really miss him all that much while he was gone but when i got home from work & walked up on the porch & saw him relaxing in the lounge chair & he greeted me with "hello there princess, how are you?" i realized how much i am truly going to miss that when i get older. so yea after dinner i ended up going to melis's house just to chill & we watched Garden State..omg great movie! the beginning was sooo boring but like after about 45 min it got really good. I am in love with natalie portman now! but as much as i love watching those movies i always find myself incredibly depressed after watching them cause i realzie how much i miss having the safe feeling that someone's arms can give you. so when i got home i just sat here at the computer all by myself & as pathetic as it sounds the tears began to pour from my eyes cause i just started to think about everything & i couldn't stop the river from flowing. it has been very rough going from being with someone for a year & a half to having someone that i thought truly liked me to having no one that i can even call & get excited when i hear their voice come across the line. i don't regret anything about my past relationships because each & every one of them have taught me something different & i am so grateful for that but its hard when all of your friends have someone & you are left sitting at home alone with no one. mom gets mad at me when i say that a certain guy is just better off as my friend, but the truth is that really there is no one that i would have a chance with that is worth going after. if that makes any sense whatsoever...i'm sure this entry is just a bunch of jumbled thoughts. thats how i feel right now, overwhelmed, jumbled. as hard as i try to shake this one person i just can't...but i don't understand why i can't cause he has done nothing but bring heartbreak in the past. but o well, who knows what could happen after prom, when no one is tied to one person cause of dates and what not. but i'm extremely excited about prom...a week from right now i will still be at PROM!! how much fun...then i will be off to maria's & i'm soo exicted about that. i really think that kenz is very mad at me & i don't know what to do about that..i just feel bad cause i told mrs tiches that i was going to her house like seriously a long time ago & i just feel really bad just not showing up! o well everything will work out in the end.
so today it rained while i was at melis's & my windows were down so maureen told me & i ran out to put them up & when i was running out...barefeet & everything...i just wanted to stay out there forever! rain is so awesome...i love it...i can't wait til the 1st real thunderstorm..i love watching them..& the first summer rain i am going to go dancing in the rain, even if it is by myself! i know i am wierd but oh well..i really don't care what others think about me, i am me & thats all i will and can ever be so if they don't like it then that is solely their problem & their loss(in my opinion)
so i apologize for the jumbleness of this entry..when i later read it i am probably going to be really mad at myself..o well..so i am obsessed with quotes & i just read the perfect one:
*I'm not even close to perfect. My hair never stays in place & i spill almost everything. I'm wicked clumsy & I always end up broken hearted. My friend & i figh tover the stupidest things, I overreact at the wrong times and i don't always match, & some days nothing seems to go right..but when i think about it & take a step back, i remember how amazing and beautiful life truely is & that maybe, just maybe, i like being unperfect
i am in love with this one!!
ok so i'm gonna stop rambling & maybe go to bed...who knows...maybe watch laguna beach...since i recorded the marathon last night! i can't wait til the new season starts! i will visit cali someday...hopefully tonight in my dreams..& maybe i will meet an adorable beach boy?!? the possibilites are endless in my dreams!

much love

6 comments|post comment

what an interesting quiz....best kisser?? how ironic [11 May 2005|09:29pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

Love and Sex With Your Friends by dannygrl0129
Favorite Color
Love of your life:smithsburger
Best sex of your life:kaylawithaface
Will make you come 1000 times:just4you12
Will break your heart:pacificvball10
Best Kisser:smithsburger
Best cuddler:just4you12
You secretly dream of:kaylawithaface
But this person dreams of you:pacificvball10
Will handcuff you and screw you silly:kaylawithaface
Quiz created with MemeGen!
1 comment|post comment

breaking out of the "goody goody" shell [25 Apr 2005|11:56pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]

so i did something that would shock a lot of people, including myself. but i will not say what or with who this happened! i will just say that it was fun...enough said. so this weekend was pretty good. friday i was off work & had to help out with the jazz festival which actually wasn't too bad, even though i thought mr r was mad @ me for a big part of the night. o well...saturday i went for an interview @ food lion(got the job), went to the tanning bed, visited aunt janet, uncle benny & my wonderfully hungover cousin Ben...that was interesting("i'm gonna take off my watch so i can try on your shoes"...lol). apparently all of ben's friends think its a shame that i am not even 17 yet & they are all like 22..i'm not exactly sure if that is a good thing considering they were all still kinda hungover. then i went to work & had to tell shirley that i was quitting in 2 weeks, she was disappointed & asked me if she could do anything to make me stay & just flat out told her that food lion would work better for me cause the schedules changed & it was closer to home...blah blah blah. then when i got off kenz came over & we went out & rented the notebook & flick came over after work..kenz ended up leaving before we even watched a min of the movie but flick spent the night & we got up & went to church & then we shopping for em's amazing birthday present..we had so much fun putting that together! then we went to em's party & i had so much fun! we played apples to apples which is a fun game..really it is...then we had a hula hoop contest & lets just say i'm not a good hula hooper..lol..then we tried to play truth or dare jenga but the jenga part didn't last to long & it turned into a fun game of truth or dare! which later evolved into a game of dare...i won't go into details on that...just keep ya guessing(all that weren't there that is) so then came home went to bed & had to get up & go to effin school today...eww...but we only have like 30 days left or something...i am going to start my countdown probably wed...i can't wait til summer...i just wanna go to the beach & meet people that are NEW & not from smithsburg! can't wait..

well i think i'm out cause its gettin late...12:07 to be exact

much love as always....:*

4 comments|post comment

random deep entry... [22 Apr 2005|11:02pm]
[ mood | content ]

so before i write this entry i want you all to know that i wrote this last night when i couldn't sleep and was unable to get on the computer. but i wanted to post it so here goes...

so here i lay on my bed, yellowcar playing & for once in the past 2 weeks I am content. Maybe its due to the fact that the stress of finding a porm date has finally resided. sometimes i wonder why i allow myself to get so worked up over such trivial matter as a porm date; the only response I can come up with is the simple idea that I am teenage girl, but that is a horrible excuse! so maybe there is no real answer. so even though my past week has been filled with tears, stress & slight heartbreak i still found happiness in lifes little pleasures. for example, here is what makes me happy:
-the smell of fresh cut grass
-waking up and hearing birds chirpping
-making people smile
-show choir
-bright blue prom shoes(that work PERFECT with my dress)
-spending time with good friends
-Being myself
-feeling a smile crawl across your face
-no work
-daily tasks
so i'm not sure if i have ever mentioned the daily tasks before & if no i apologive. Mr R gives our a "daily task" everyday & ithay are aimed to make others feel good along with yourself. Well the past 2 days tasks have been awesome & i would feel horrible if i kept them all to myself and not share them with you all. so yesterday's was: "Following a Born to Win seminar several years ago, Zig Ziglar met with a beautiful young black woman. She was college graduate and a very successful businesswoman yet she clearly was struggling with something. She began to speak hesitantly saying "you know, I finally found out this afternoon wht I cam to this seminar." The she paused to compose herself. She continued, "You know, in my lifetime, i believe you'r the first person who ever looked right at me and told me you loved me and I did not have the feeling anything was involved other than the fact that I was a human being and I, like all others needed to be loved,"....How about you? Do you love people only when there is a hidden agenda, or do you love them because they are human beings who simply need to be loved?" This is so true, how many times in our lives do we look down on certain people whom others believe are not deserving of love. I believe that I am trying to live my life loving everyone cause no on is not deserving of love. Even our enemies, for example, I love my enemies for the lessons they have all taught me.
ok today's taks was: "Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote: To laugh often and much, with the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to know you have succeeded!" How about you are you on your way to being successful?" the only words I could even mutter were wow. i believe that laughter is the best medicine available to anything.. Just the simple joy of watching a smile over take a gloomy face can brighten the worst of days. and you can not possibly grow without the honesty of critics and learning to appreciate their honesty will only result positively. And the betraal of false friends, that is something hard to over come but essentially getting through something like that makes you appreciate the amazing friendships so much more. To appreciate beauty & see the best in others go hand in hand becuase sometimes others are blind to the beauty that people represent. The most beautiful things & attributes come from within a person & that is seeing the best in everyone. I hope that when my time comes many years down the road that I leave this place a bit better then when I came both physically and by sharing my spirit with others. HOpefully i have made someone breathe easier because I lived. I believe that already at my young age of 16(almost 17) i have done this. I can not wait to fill my life with other experiences that will help me to become more successful. So it is supermadcrazy how this entry has been so DEEP, I have no idea where this all came from but i have enjoyed writing down these thought and being able to share my opinions with those who read my journal is great. I hope that maybe you will take something from this and if not thats fine also, i still enjoyed writing it all


much love :*

4 comments|post comment

so in love with rascall flatts right now.... [18 Apr 2005|11:12pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]

so these lyrics are so awesum...i cryed over the skin one soo much & the other 2 just have provided me w/ some home..i wanted to share them w/ everyone...


There's three in the Hall from those pictures in the closet
Two in the bedroom from that night I lost it
And one deep inside me determined to stay
They don't get any bigger but they don't go away

Holes in and around me I keep falling back into
Holes dig in and surround me
God knows what I'm gonna do
To fill in these holes left by you
Left by you

I pour drink after drink but nothing hit bottom
I've been on my knees admitted my problems
The love that we made still barely an echo
I'll try anything in these vacant hollow


There's two through my hands and one through my feet
From this cross that I bare to the day that I see
Its guilt and its blame its shame and its love
Seeking the truth I dug them myself

All these holes dig in and surround me
God knows what I'm gonna' do
To fill up these holes left by you


Sarah Beth is scared to death
To hear what the doctor will say
She hasn't been well
Since the day that she fell
And the bruise, just won't go away
So she sits and she waits with her mother and dad
Flips through an old magazine
Till a the nurse with a smile
Stands at the door
And says will you please come with me

Sarah Beth is scared to death
Cause the doctor just told her the news
Between the red cells and white
Something's not right
But we're gonna take care of you

Six chances in ten it won't come back again
With the therapy were gonna try
It's just been approved
It's the strongest there is
I think we caught it in time

Sarah Beth closes her eyes
And she dreams she's dancing
Around and around without any cares
And her very first love is holding her close
And the soft wind is blowing her hair

Sarah Beth is scared to death
As she sits holding her mom
Cause it would be a mistake
For someone to take
A girl with no hair to the prom

For, just this morning right there on her pillow
Was the cruelest of any surprise
And she cried when she gathered it all in her hands
The proof that she couldn't deny

Sarah Beth closes her eyes
And she dreams she's dancing
Around and around without any cares
And her very first love was holding her close
And the soft wind is blowing her hair

Its quarter to seven
That boys at the door
And her daddy ushers him in
And when he takes off his cap
They all start to cry
Cause this mornin where his hair had been
Softly she touches just skin

And they go dancin
Around and around without any cares
And her very first true love is holding her close
And for a moment she isn't scared

When the Sand Runs Out

I spent the morning at an old friend's grave
Flowers and Amazing Grace, he was a good man
He spent his whole life spinnin' his wheels
Never knowin' how the real thing feels
He never took a chance or took the time to dance
And I stood there thinking as I said goodbye
Today is the first day of the rest of my life

I'm gonna stop lookin' back and start movin' on
And learn how to face my fears
Love with all of my heart, make my mark
I wanna leave something here

Go out on a ledge, with out any net
That's what I'm gonna be about
Yeah I wanna be runnin'
When the sand runs out

'Cause people do it everyday
Promise themselves they're gonna change
I've been there, but I'm changin' from the inside out

That was then and this is now
I'm a new man, yeah, I'm a brand new man
And when they carve my stone they'll write these words
"Here lies a man who lived life for all that its worth"

I'm gonna stop lookin' back and start movin' on
Learn how to face my fears
Love with all of my heart, make my mark
I wanna leave something here

Go out on a ledge, with out any net
That's what I'm gonna be about
Yeah I wanna be runnin'
When the sand runs out

well i just wanted to share those w/ you guys cause i thought they were GREAT but now i'm out so nite all

much love as always

post comment

i love spring & good days.. [09 Apr 2005|11:41pm]
[ mood | giddy ]

so today was an awesome day! well first of all, it was gorgeous. 2ndly i was pampered this morning(aka went to the tanning bed then got the digits done(nails)) the only bad part was that i had to work..i worked from like 2 til 9. the paycheck should be decent but i HATE working that long. but after work..wow is all i can say. i met t, kenz, kristi, bagga, & *bohan* @ ritas only to be dissappointed to find out that they were closed. so then we decided on an alternative...DQ. so off we go to the dual, we get some ice cream, are stared down by creepy guys in 5 mile long cars & yea it was fun. bohan gave me his sweatshirt cause i was cold. so anyways after DQ we go to t's house & hang out for a little while. it was fun....so then comes the time when i have to leave so it ends up being when everyone else leaves...bohan walks me to my car, opens up the door & we are like talkin & i swear to God i thought for sure that he was gonna kiss me right there but he didn't. so i'm home & i get a text that says i wanted to kiss you soo bad tonight & we talked a little through texts & apparently we are hanging out tomorrow & i'm super excited! this is def lookin like some prom date material here! who knows though..

well i would love to write longer but i'm gettin tired & i think i'm gonna try to sleep a lil

much love

2 comments|post comment

obessesions.... [07 Apr 2005|09:58pm]
[ mood | hyper...flippin energy drink ]

so tonight was soo much fun. i forget how much i miss hanging out with my friends. plus just the thought of prom & possible prom dates & beautiful prom desses excites me! flick almost has a date which is SUPER exciting, kenz pretty much is covered & em has josh of course. now there is just me. i have someone in mind but who knows...i really would love to be asked in a creative way. that would be so cute & i'm sure that this person can be creative if he tried. i don't know, like is it wierd that i'm kinda stressing over the whole no prom date & it is like 5-6 weeks away. O-M-G that is soooo close...wow! amazing, thats all i've got to say.
so i am in love with rita's & fazolis & nysnc & everything that i did tonight. omg & maria's flippin ice is soo good(don't laugh until you've tried it, trust me)! so i feel like now i'm just rambling but i am sooo awake & so hyper. i had a dr pepper & fazolis then a mango ice at ritas & then i had an energy drink so i am like bouncing off the WALLS! ahh i'm soo like AHHHHHHH! ok so now i think i'm gonna go cause i have some reading to do for english..i think hot tub, i feel like candles too. wish mom would let me have some wine! wow so that was random! ok going to read catcher in the rye(is it in or and...omg)for real now!

peace out(as kip would say)

much love

2 comments|post comment

i have NO life [30 Mar 2005|10:00pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

EXTREMELY LONG SURVEY for those bored people out there!

Created by hotlikewhoa and taken 110 times on bzoink!

The Basics
First Name:erin
Middle Name:elizabeth
Last Initial:w
Date of Birth:May 25, 1988
Place of Birth:Washington County Hospital
Current Location:Hagerstown/Smithsburg
Hair Color:red
Eye Color:brown/green
Height:5'6 or 5'7
Do drugs?:nope
Movies:A Walk to Remember, Sweet Home Alabama
TV Shows:Laguna Beach, The OC, Desperate Housewives, Extremem Makeover: Home Edition
Books:Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
Bands:Maroon 5
Singers:John Mayer
Radio stations:any that play good music
Albums:like all of mine...really like the laguna beach one
Actors:Shane West..duh
Actresses:Reese Witherspoon & Kirsten Dunst
Historical figures:Clara Barton
Board games:Mall Madness & MadGab
Computer games:...who plays computer games?
Video games:um i kinda mario kart..yes i know pathetic
Colors:pink, orange, blue & green
Animals:dog, horse, moose(messe..lol)
This or That
Pepsi or Coke:pepsi
McDonald's or Burger King:burger king
Left or Right:right
Britney or Christina:i don't know..dont really like either of them
Jessica or Ashlee:jessica..but i like ashlee too
Mary-Kate or Ashley:i can't tell the difference
Usher or Justin:usher
Orlando Bloom or Johnny Depp:johnny depp
Ocean or Pool:ocean
Lake or River:lake
Rock or Pop:pop
Country or Rap:country
Emo or Indie:emo
Jazz or Oldies:oldies
Hip-Hop or R&B:r&b
Moon or Stars:stars
Sun or Rain:sun
Day or Night:night
Late nights or Early mornings:late nights
Summer or Winter:summer
Spring or Fall:spring
Silly or Serious:there is a time for both
Have you ever...
Done drugs?nope
Had alcohol?with mom
Gotten drunk?no
Gone to 1st base?yes
2nd base?yes
3rd base?????
All the way?no
Ran into a stop sign?no...but i have stopped at a green light..lol flick
Gone skydiving?nope but i would love to
Done rockclimbing?yes
Been a witness in a crime scene?car accidents count?
Screamed a swear word in a stranger's face?no
Hugged a stranger?yes
Or anything more with a stranger?no
Flicked someone off?yes
Been on a date?yes
Lied to a boyfriend/girlfriend?no
Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend?no
Gone hunting?with my daddy when i was like 6
Been fishing?yes
Single/In love/In a relationship/Other:single..but crushing majorly
How many boy/girlfriends have you had?only 1 serious
How many do you have now?none
How many do you think you will have?????what kind of question is that
If you're single, are you sick of this section?yes..very
If you're taken, how long have you two been together?
What's the most you've done with your significant other?i'm sure you all want to know
Are you two serious?
To single people: Can you forgive me for making this section?maybe..
Best:bs(bloodsisters...just so you know)
Worst (ones you pretend to like but secretly hate):b & b
Oldest:flick..we go back to like middle school
Biggest Ditz:all of us
Loudest:barbie..but i love her with all my heart
Most Quiet:amanda
Most Obnoxious:joe
Weirdest:we are all wierd...what are you talking about
Funnest:joe...i already said that
Hottest:*****...i know you want to know..too bad
Ugliest:we are all beautiful
Best listener:kenz
Best talker:flick
Most energetic:bs
Most mellow:???
Most missed:beth
Write down the first thing that comes to mind when I say...
Digital camera:want for my birthday
Garfield:the movie
School planner:who carries one?
Baseball:i actually understand it
Laffy Taffy:yum
Hollister:def want to go there sometime
Cheesecake:with strawberries?? yummy
Scrapbook:i love mine
American flag:USA
Pine Sol:wierd lady on the commercials
Newspaper:nothing interesting
Cell phone:mines a piece of CRAP
Your Dream Guy/Girl
Eye color:????
Hair color:????
Hair length:kinda in between
Hair style:???
Height:taller then me...6'
Clothing style:like mine...i guess you call that preppy
Favorite music:what i like
Druggie?:def not
Age:mine or 2 to 3 years older
Overall body type:atheletic
Best feature(s):smile & eyes
Dream date:rent a movie & watch at his house while cuddling on the couch & then go outside & gaze at the stars on a blanket in the grass
Sweet or Bad Ass?a mix
Romantic or Laid-Back?both
Hot or Cute or Both or Neither?a little of everything
Dream date with them:same as before
What is your favorite memory?wisdom teeth...rite kenz?
Worst favorite?oxymoron..
Best year?junior def
Worst year?freshmen
Any regrets?why dwell in the past..but if i have to then yes being with someone when the feelings were non-existent
Have you changed a lot over the years?yes def...we all do
For the better or the worse?better i hope
Do you hate change?no..its what makes life worth living
Can you easily move on?sometimes
Are new beginnings good or bad?good
What's the best thing anyone's ever done for you?been my friend
Do you plan on going to college? Where at?yea..Shepherd(hopefully)
Do you want to get married? If so, what age?yes...22 or 23
Describe your dream wedding.i just want a short wedding & a awesome reception & i wanna feel like a PRINCESS
Do you want to have kids?yes
If so, how many?2
Adopted or Not?not
Favorite Girl Names:Rachel, Katie
Favorite Boy Names:Shane, Josh
Do you want to travel the world, or any specific place?i'd love to go to France & the caribbeans
Where do you want to live? In what kind of home?in the country in a beautiful house
What will your career be?elementary school teacher
What sort of car do you want to own?suv
Any pets?yes
If so, how many? What kind?1 or 2 dogs
Do you believe that you'll be successful in your future?yes
Anything else you'd like to share?nope
Random Questions
What's your lucky number(s)?9
Do you prefer markers, colored pencils, or crayons?markers
Do you hate your birthday?no
Do you have an iPod?no but i wish i did
Is the world too hypocritical?i don't know
Are you into politics?nope
Is AIDS going to be cured in your lifetime?i hope
Do you play any sports?volleyball
Are cardboard boxes fun?yes
Do security cameras make you feel paranoid?no..i love the ones at work
How many times have you been on an airplane in your lifetime?2
Do you believe in...
Love at first sight?yes
True love?yes
Aliens (or forms of life on other planets)?kinda
Pots of gold at the end of a rainbow?yes
Gay marriage?no
The End
What time is it?959
Did you enjoy this survey?kinda
Will you miss me?no
Was this long enough?yes
Any last words?shut up

Create a Survey | Search Surveys | Go to bzoink!

2 comments|post comment

what a week... [24 Mar 2005|12:03am]
[ mood | exhausted ]

so tonight was the sadie hawkins dance, went amazing! so excited about that...i was told by some people that it would be a flop & it def wasn't at all! i had soooo much fun! i got to dance with like everyone including some people that i didn't expect to. The thing that confuses me though is that when the song was over unlike all the other guys that i danced with he was the only one who held on til the END. i don't know...i refuse to read way to much into it cause i've learned that that only messes with your heart & your emotions which essentially leads to heart break. which i am trying to stay away from. this person is a nice guy but like all the rest confusing....i don't know we'll see.
but yea this week as been kinda stressful & i think i'm going to go to bed cause i'm EXHAUSTED after today!


love ya much

2 comments|post comment

[08 Mar 2005|09:01pm]
[ mood | tired ]

so this week is the most exciting week out of my junior year & i'm super excited...play week! OKLAHOMA, where the wind comes sweeping down the plains!...ahh soo nice! But i must say that i did enjoy my evening off to just chill, went & got my nails done which was very relaxing & much needed. something about people playing with my hair & doing my nails makes me soo sleepy! but it is soo great. um & tomorrow we don't have play practice, i don't know what i'm gonna do with myself. maybe i can squeeze in a much needed hair cut that i have been trying to do like FOREVER!
so i wish that i could understand why my heart finds pleasure in confusing me! anthony has been acting odd here of late & i'm not sure how to handle it at all..like i don't know if he is flirting with me cause there is some sort of attraction there or if he just enjoys playing the mind games! i'm kinda hoping that it is the 1st one but who knows. & just when i think that i have all my feelings in check, & i've decided that i don't need anyone, someone else comes into view from out of no where & he is such a sweetheart but i don't know what to think about that. i know what all my friends would say if i told them what i felt, they would all say erin where is your head, eww. but the truth is i don't really care what others think...this person is a gentlemen & very nice & cute in his own way. but who knows, i'm not going to pursue anything, if it is meant to happen then it will happen, just like i have been saying about the whole anthony & i'm so glad that i have come to the realization that things are probably never going to happen so i'm not quite as attached when he does the little things. But unfortunatly i can't escape the giddy feelings that i have when he walks by me or talks to me, or come on, puts his arm around my waist & pulls me close. how can i not feel somethinw ehn he does that kind of crap...not cool at all!!! but the other person..i have been spending a lot of time with him lately so i think that it is what is to blame for these feelings & he treats me like a princess & were not even anyhting, just really good friends right now. but he is always there when i need someone, making sure that i'm ok & that i'm not flippin out & that no one hurts me..how sweet...who knows though, my emotions are just a blur right now so i've decided to put all of this on hold & focus on something else, but i still find it incredibly hard to do...i will just have to do my best!

well i think i'm out for the night...

keep it real like a seal

much love

2 comments|post comment

my layers.... [03 Mar 2005|11:24pm]
[ mood | grateful ]


Full name: Erin Elizabeth Weatherly
Birth date: May 25, 1988
Birthplace: Hagerstown, MD
Current location: Hagerstown/Smithsburg

Eye color: brown & green
Hair color: RED!
Righty or Lefty: righty
Zodiac Sign: gemini

Your heritage: German, Irish
Shoes you wore today?: clogs
Your weakness: chocolate
Your fears: spiders, monsters, not living life to the fullest
Your perfect pizza: stuffed crust w/ cheese & mushrooms

Your most overused phrase on AIM: lol
Your thoughts waking up: but the bed feels soo great
Your best physical feature: hair?
Your bedtime: whenever my eyes close
Your most missed memory(ies): workcamp 2004 & any inside jokes w/ the blood sisters

Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi
McDonald's or Burger King: BK
Single or Group Dates: single..but group is fun too
Adidas or Nike: Adidas
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappuccino

Smoke: no
Cuss: kinda
Single: am i? yes...like a pringle but ready to mingle
Take a shower everyday: yes
Think you've been in love: yes..but fell out
Like(d) high school: the social part..not the school
Want to get married: daydream about it all the time
Believe in yourself: most of the time
Get motion sickness: no
Think you're a health freak: sometimes
Get along with your parents: Usually
Like thunderstorms: Only in the summer
Play an instrument: piano & flute

Drank alcohol: no
Done a drug: nope
Gone on a date: yes
Gone to the mall: yes
Been on stage: yes...OKLAHOMA!
Eaten an entire box of Oreos: no....but flick & i did eat a thing of chips ahoy
Eaten sushi: no
Been dumped: kinda..not really though
Gone skating: No
Gone skinny dipping: No
Dyed your hair: are you crazy.. i would be shot in the face
Stolen anything: nope

Played a game that required removal of clothing: don't you wann know
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: um...if the meds they gave me for wisdom teeth..then yes..rite kj
Been called a tease?: not to my face
Gotten beaten up: no
Shoplifted: no
Changed who you were to fit in: probably, but not no more

Age you hope to be married: 22-23
Numbers of children: 2
Describe your dream wedding: um princess dress, in my church, short, bangin party afterwards(HD..cause we'll be legal..yea joe!), be madly in love
How do you want to die: Happy
What do you want to be when you grow up?:An amazing 2nd or 3rd grade teacher
What country would you most like to visit: England

Number of people I could trust with my life: probably like 10
Number of CD's I own: too many to count
Number of piercings: 4
Number of tattoos: zip
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: a few
Number of scars on my body: do permenant bumps on your head count? if so then like 5
Number of things in my past that I regret: a lot

1 comment|post comment

dear heart... [03 Mar 2005|11:19pm]
[ mood | dorky..hott glasses!(its me!) ]

Dear Heart,
I think you remember me, i tend not to care for your feelings and throw you around a lot -sorry for that. i just thought i'd warn you that i fell for a boy today. prepare to break.

(thats supposed to sound like a good thing)

so things have been goin ok..OKLAHOMA next weekend..everyone had better come see me say my famous line & sing that amazing verse! can't wait to rock the stage..not much else to say other then i'm tired of waiting around for mr. right...done trying to look as well..just gonna enjoy life the way that i should! yea for erin..right?? o well the anthony situation is confusing & i'm trying my best not to fall..but um yea did you not read my letter to my heart..hello..can't help that one! o well..off to bed now cause i'm dead..

keep it real like a seal (lol kenz...don't ask, i completely just made that up off the top of my head in ap us history & cracked myself up..i love when i do that..it's nice)

much L.O.V.E. as always

post comment

GIRLS NIGHT! [20 Feb 2005|04:45pm]
[ mood | excited ]

so i'm incredibly excited about tonite...girls nite @ my house! we will be one blood sister short but its ok cause i'm sure she is having an AMAZING time..were gonna call her! But yea em & kenz should be here soon & i rented The "Novel" & Anchorman so we will shed some tears & also some laughs! plus we r gonna do pedicures & i got the parfin wax thing from my aunt & i'm so excited about using that! plus we all decided that there will be a major gab session sometime during the evening! o my & daddy is making dinner for us...bbq ribs & mom made some vege soup which is soo exciting (i love mommy's vege soup!) so yea this is gonna be a wonderful nite! i am soo ready you have no idea! can't wait to watch the notebook, the book was great, sad but really good! i know that i will bawl cause all of the books that Nicholas Sparks has written that have been turned into a movie have been incredibly heart breaking

well i'm out for now

much love

1 comment|post comment

why????????? [15 Feb 2005|09:07pm]
[ mood | okay ]

why do i get myself so worked up over something sooo incredibly STUPID! i swear..everything that i have been upset over lately is sooo trivial & i don't understand why i'm soo worked up about it. one person is not worth any of this...guyz are jerks & thats all there is to it. things with anthony were goin great & then out of no where he won't talk to me any & he just completely ignores me..i don't know! i really wish that i could have one chance to try to make a relationship work...being single is wonderful, don't get me wrong but i really wish that i had someone to hug & kiss..i miss that! its still really hard coming out of a 2 year relationship & not have any of the little things anymore?!?! i don't know why i'm so blah...i have so many other things that i can concentrate on...school, work, my best buds! i swear i don't understand myself sometimes..its no wonder no one will have me! everyone says that anthony & i would work but they all think that he just gets to this point where he freezes when he thinks that there might be something there...& i'm not "attached" but still i just don't know what to think at all! he is soo hard to read! o well give it time..i kinda wanna say something to him but i have decided that i'm just gonna lay low & not say ne thing..just try to be a friend & maybe then i can bring it up later...all i can say is that i'm just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to give me just one chance! i think it would just be fun to hang out just as friends! i would seriously love to just hang out!
so em & kenz & i have decided that me, em, kenz & flick all need a girls nite...possibily sunday!! my sister leaves on thur for TX so i'm an only child til next wed! how exciting! so yea sun we mite have a sleepover somewhere! that is soo much needed! i hope it works out...kenz & i get to spend some time together 2morrow cause we have a WCSC meeting in the morning so yea it is some much needed twin sister time & i'm excited even though its like SGA stuff.. hello get to miss some school..super exciting!! but yea well i don't really know what else to write i think i'm just gonna talk to a few more people then go to bed & sleep off the day! hopefully things will look brighter tomorrow morning when i roll out of bed! :.:fingers crossed:.:

nite kids

much L.O.V.E.

3 comments|post comment

i need a vacation.. [02 Feb 2005|10:51pm]
[ mood | i need a vacation! ]

so i've decided that i desperately need a vacation! i want to go to the beach sooo bad! ne ways so things are still kinda awkward but not nearly as awkward as they have been which is good. at the end of the day i was seriously in the WORST mood ever & the whole way down the hill all i did was complain(i am very disappointed in myself). then i went to play practice & seriously it cheered me up sooo much! we worked of farmer & the cowman which was fun cause i like that dance! so yea i was in a good mood after that! got to see barb's boy toy..looks like a decent guy! i'm super estatic for her! then 2morrow me, barb, flick & mi are all goin out to eat then to port city for some open mic! 2nite i was supposed to go get a checking account but they were closed so i was kinda mad! but i got my check cashed ne ways & we went to wal-mart & i got the new Kenny Chesney CD which is seriously amazing! i love the songs...they are all island related & i love the lyrics...so far these are my favorite songs:

Be As You Are

Man, I could use a Pina Colada
Little bit of sun on my skin
A hammock, a book
Never gonna look back
Once my feet hit the sand
I've had it up to here with this rat race
Need a smile on my face

I wanna go where I can lighten up the load
Drive a little while on the wrong side of the road
Get this laying low off to a flying start
Play my guitar in the Caribbean sun
Hang with the loacs at the Quiet Mon
Where you can be a tourist, a beach bum or a star
And be as you are

Gettin' stuck sure would be easy
In this palm tree paradise
Ambition fades with every wave
For the finer things in life
Maybe I'll just hang around here
Go home later next year

I wanna play my guitar in the Caribbean sun
Hang with the locals at the Quiet Mon
Where you can be a tourist, a beach bum or a star
And be as you are
Be as you are

Somewhere In The Sun

Stuck here are a Holiday Inn near Austin, Texas
Seen all the road that I want to see
God I hate the snow, they even cancelled the show
Makes me long for where I really want to be

Oh, I wish I was there tonight on Jost Van Dyke
Sipping on some Foxy's Firewater rum
Or, kickin' back with Ivan
With all my friends down in the islands
Wouldn't take much for me to up and run
To another life somewhere in the sun

Got cold fajitas and only one channel on the TV
Andy and Barney on Nick at Nite
Seen and ad for Mexico
God I really want to go
Anywhere out of mind and out of sight

Here's a toast to you on the coast and the sailors our at see
Drink your ales, hoist your sails
Ride the winds and think of me cause

Oh, I wish I was there tonight on Jost Van Dyke
Sipping on some Foxy's Firewater rum
Or, kickin' back with Ivan
With all my friends down in the islands
Wouldn't take much for me to up and run
To another life somewhere in the sun

Somewhere in the sun

so yea i'm in love with this awesome cd...i'm not really sure what else to write so i think i'm gonna get goin so yea....i will write later

5 comments|post comment

...AwKwArD... [29 Jan 2005|11:54pm]
[ mood | ..AwkWaRd.. ]

so i've decided that the only way to describe my mood is awkward! i'm a mixture of upset, disappointed, confused, happy, & soooo many more!! it is seriously sooo wierd. plus rite now i feel like a horrible friend to KJ..i kinda forgot about her on the phone cause RYAN & i were chattin about his relationship situation & what i think that he should do..should he or shouldn't he take this girl back. i love it how people ask me what to do as if i will know cause you know i can def handle my own issues(sarcasm!!)..no but i felt special cause he called me..we talked for almost 45 min & it wasn't like one of the whole ever an wierd silence convos like it was soo full of interesting topics. well of course we talked about his situation & he told me that rite now i'm the only person that he can relate to on this & he wants to talk to me about it & i felt so incredibly honored! then we talked about how we are both christians & how he found christ which is supermadwickedawesomecrazy AMAZING! it was just a really good convo...we both have a lot in common..we both believe that everything happens for a reason & that God has a plan for everyone & he thinks that him being transferred to the dual highway was God's way of making him & i meet because he believes that we were destined to meet! like those 45 min of my nite helped me in so many ways...my day was made slightly better
so we also had play practice all day 2day so that was fun as well...it got to be a lil much though towards the end cause everyone was gettin real tired n what not so everyone was grumpy! but its all good..we got a good deal accomplished so that was exciting!
so i feel like i haven't vented in a lil while & i think that i need to just let my fingers go...i don't know what to do about anything rite now..things are best where they are rite now i believe as hard as it is to realize all of this they truely are..i just wish that things weren't so awkward between us..like tonite i kept catching myself looking for him & i know that i shouldn't..its good that i was not as attached to him as i was to chris..i still just don't understand why he sorta led me on with the kissing & what not cause that is prolly what hurts the most. i just don't understand why i didn't refrained myself like i should have..i'm not a very open person the way i was with him. it was just that i felt so comfortable with him & it felt like the rite thing to do at the time even though now my heart is paying for all of it. but I WILL SURVIVE! i'm just done trying...when things are meant to happen then they will & God only knows when that is, but i'm sure that he will let things happen when the time is rite..at least i' hopin that he will.
well its kinda late n i have church in the mornin & who knows what else & i'm gettin kinda sleepy..so i think i mite try to go upstairs & get some shut eye after a LONG day!

nite kids...

much L.O.V.E.

erin's inspriational thought of the day: follow your *heart* but don't forget to use your head!

5 comments|post comment

confused...but still happy... [27 Jan 2005|09:57pm]
[ mood | okay ]

um so bob n i are just gonna be friends for rite now..prolly forever actually..it doesn't look like ne thing is gonna come out of this whole situation. i don't know..like he said he just didn't feel like oh my gosh when he kissed me..it was more like "whatever". who knows..i sure as heck dont! if it was just "whatever" then why did he keep doin it? i don't know..no need to dwell over something pointless..i'm comfortable with the way things are..& i seriously totally respect him sooooo much for just telling me how he felt rather then leading me on & like seriously hurting me like he who must not be named did! my heart is just fine rite now!
so 2nite i had a girls nite w/ barb & mia & we had soo much fun! went to texas road house & ate their amazing BREAD!! then we went to port city & i got to talk to josh & it was fun! like josh is such nice guy & i talked to him last nite about a lot & he like helped me...i have never been able to really talk to a guy about the stuff that i talked to him about! but yea so i'm not sure what to do with the whole bob situation but i think that the best thing i can do is just let everything lay low for a while & not really mention ne thing & maybe in a few weeks we can try hangin out just as friends..i hope so. i really would love to have a friendship with him even if it doesn't result in ne thing but that! but i don't know what to do..its not like i can just say ok heart its not workin out so stop feeling this way..but i'm very very proud of myself! i have not broken down at all...em told me that that shows amazing strength considering i cried over he who must not be named for almost a MONTH!! how ridiculous is that..very i must say..i'm very ashamed of myself! o well, i'm ok now so thats all that matters..i've just decided that boys are not worth it right now..like seriously all i'm doin is makin myself look bad so i'm done..when the time is right someone will come..and maybe now isn't the time & i guess i'm ok with that...

thats it for the night kids...

much L.O.V.E.......love M.E.

post comment

all i can do is S.M.I.L.E..... [25 Jan 2005|10:43pm]
[ mood | giddy ]

so tonight was soo much fun! its been a while since i have been like this & couldn't stop smiling! very exciting! so brian & i hung out..went to the bball game & then to ac&t to get something to drink! it was sooo much fun..just trust me on that one! so then we ended up coming back to my house & chillin in like practically EVERY room in my house..lol..but it was all good...we basically just talked about how cold my hands were, how we were both losers & other random stuff like that! it was fun...for once i didn't feel uncomfortable with a guy...i seriously was not that nervous at all tonight & it was exciting cause i was just erin & i think that he likes me..just the way that i am! FINALLY i don't have to pretend to be anything! you have no idea how exciting this is for me! i'm pretty sure that there is a connection there of some sort..i hope so at least! we'll just have to wait & see how things go...i'm perfectly fine with takin things slow & workin our way into this whole thing!

so em fav thinks that she mite have a crush on JACK! how exciting..shes not positive though! but we will figure this out..i agree with her that they need some one-on-one time with just him & her & like just chill & talk & get to know each other...thats when they will really know if there is anything there at all!

so em told me that i had to do this thingy...

if i knew that i would die tomorrow there is so much that i would do! well first of all i would talk to everyone that i currently have a problem with(aka chris) & tell them that everything is fine that it will all be ok someday! i would go to georgia with joe & count all the swamps, go to disney & be ariel, call KJ & Flick & have a blood sister road trip to cali, ride a rollercoaster(any i don't care), wear a pretty dress(aka try on bridal gowns), watch a walk to remember & meet shane west, go to a john mayer concert, play the guitar, go to the Bahamas, meet Talan from Laguna Beach, play volleyball, call everyone in my cell, tell my family how much i love them, drive Ben's truck(that means i would have to learn how to drive stick!), go snowtubbing, then i would come home & chill with my family & watch funny movies(like dodgeball, meet the parents, & men in tights)

so i'm hopin that i can go upstairs crawl in bed & have a WoNdErFuL dream about my aMaZiNg nite...that spells F.U.N.!!!! nite all

much love as always

post comment

[23 Jan 2005|10:40pm]
[ mood | happy ]

so 2nite was beth's last nite in the burg so we all went out 2nite to Texas Road House to bid her farewell..it was very sad! i seriously almost cried! then i came home & i've been chattin with em all nite bout fun stuff like crushes & code names! em has become a really good friend of mine & i'm very excited about that! she is sooo much like me..we have a lot in common! we talked bout that 2nite...
but now i'm chattin with bob & that is incredibly EXCITING!

so sorry this isn't very long but i'm a lil preoccupied!


much LOVE!

post comment

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]